wikiHow to Cope With Friends Who Turn Against You

One of the downsides of friendships is the potential for a friend to backstab or betray you. When a friend turns against you, it may feel like the end of the world, especially if this person is who you would normally turn to during times of need. Coping with friends who turn against you requires compassionate attention to your own emotions as well as closely considering the status of the current relationship and moving forward accordingly.

Learn how to care for your hurt feelings and handle a disloyal friend, too.

1 Acknowledge the pain of disloyalty. It hurts to have someone turn against you or to find out someone you thought was a close friend may not really be who you thought. It’s normal to be upset and there is no need to hide the fact that you are hurt.^[1]
- Acknowledge the pain by stating it aloud. Name the emotion that you are feeling and own your reaction to it. “I am disappointed because I placed my trust in someone who backstabbed me.”
- While you can acknowledge the feelings, remember you are the only one who controls how you react to this disloyalty. In some cases, this person may be treating you a certain way with the hope that you will react in a big way. It is far better to take a step back and reflect on how you are feeling, instead of acting out in the moment.
2 Take time to reflect. Just as some romantic relationships benefit from a break, friendships can also benefit from time apart. Take this break to think about any major choices like confronting the friends or completely ending the friendships. You may find that you calm down after a few days, or you may find that during the break you actually feel better without the friends.
- You can also use this time to consider opening yourself to making some new friends who are more supportive. Spend time with a few other acquaintances, classmates, or coworkers. Do you notice yourself liking being with…