Author: Alexandra Hayes / Source: Big Think
If you identify as being a socially conscious person in today’s age of outrage, you’ve likely experienced the bewildering sensation when a conversation that was once harmless, suddenly doesn’t feel that way anymore. Perhaps you’re out for a quick bite with family, friends, or coworkers when the conversation takes a turn. Someone’s said something that doesn’t sit right with you, and you’re unsure of how to respond. Navigating social situations like this is inherently stressful.
Below are five expert-approved tips on how to maintain your cool and effectively communicate.
#1: Don’t Forget to Breathe
“If you’re trying to speak out in a way that has true power, the first thing you should do is take a deep breath,” Dr. Steven Fabick, Ed.D., a clinical psychologist in Birmingham, MI, says.
“Once you do, you’re more likely to speak in a way that’s clear and articulate, and you’re less likely to try and vanquish or embarrass the other person.”#2: Don’t Be Accusatory
When a disagreement is impassioned and personal, phrases like, “that’s ridiculous,” or “you’re impossible,” often get thrown around. This is called a psychoanalytic interpretation, notes Dr. Jerry Goodman, Ph.D. and Professor Emeritus of Clinical Psychology at UCLA. Put simply, it’s when you label another person to their face — a tactic that can quickly offend people and veer you away from a productive conversation quickly. These interpretations can be non-verbal, too — like visibly rolling your eyes.
If you’re feeling heated and on the verge of giving someone a psychoanalytic interpretation, Dr. Goodman suggests giving yourself some distance before speaking up. You’ll…
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