Source: wikiHow
Co-authored by wikiHow Staff |29 References
In this Article:Building up to a First KissGoing in for a KissFollowing up After the KissCommunity Q&A29 References
A first kiss between two people is always a big deal. You may feel even more pressure to get it right if it’s your partner’s first kiss ever.
Luckily, there are things you can do to make the situation less intimidating for both of you. By doing your best to put your partner at ease, approaching the kiss slowly, and treating your partner with respect after the kiss, you can help create a great first kiss experience for both of you.- 1 Recognize the importance of the moment for the other person. A first kiss is an important rite of passage on an individual level, and it’s often taken as a sign of commitment or as a signal that the relationship is moving forward. People who have never been kissed before may attach even more weight to the moment, so don’t pursue a kiss unless you’re really interested in the other person.[1]
- 2 Decide when you’d like to try kissing your partner. You could try pulling the other person aside when you’re hanging out in a group setting, but it may be harder to gauge whether they want a kiss if they’re surrounded by friends. Most people, however, will expect a kiss while on a date, or at least they may view it as a possibility. Try taking your partner on a date, and going in for a kiss at the end.[2]
- Don’t wait too long before going in for a kiss. If you spend weeks or months flirting with your partner, they may lose interest and try to move on from you.[3]
- 3 Show your partner you’re interested by flirting with them. Whenever you’re around the other person, smile at them and offer compliments. Try saying, “you look really nice today!” You can also show them you’re interested by asking their opinion or seeking advice, and putting away your phone and giving them your full attention.[4]
- Make sure your compliment is genuine. Find something honest and specific to tell the other person. Say, “that shirt brings out the beautiful color of your eyes,” or “I’m really impressed by the way that you are able to speak your mind.”[5]
- You can also show someone you’re interested by contacting them when you’re not hanging out. Try sending a note or message just to say hi, or tell them, “Hey! I just saw this cute picture that reminded me of you.”[6]
- 4 Strike up a good conversation in order to connect on a deeper level. Start by asking the other person about themselves, and offering up information about yourself in turn. Try to move beyond basic small talk by asking interesting questions such as “What was a defining moment in your life?” or “What is your dream job?”[7]
- Be curious and interested in what the other person is saying. Asking follow-up questions shows your partner you’re listening, and helps you connect.[8]
- Be willing to share more personal and vulnerable things about yourself, when appropriate. It will help your partner feel more comfortable and learn more about you.[9]
- 5 Use positive body language to show you’re paying attention. Making lots of eye contact and smiling at the other person can give them a clue that you’re interested. Mimicking their behavior in small ways, such as running your fingers through your hair after they’ve tucked their hair behind their ear, can also make your partner more drawn to you.[10]
- Take a minute to think about the other person’s body language, too. If they look like they’re not interested, then it’s probably not the right moment for the big kiss. Negative signals include things like your partner leaning away from you, crossing their arms in front of their chest, or not making much eye contact.[11]
- 6 Touch your partner and gauge their response. Lightly tap your partner’s arm or lay your hand on theirs. If they smile, lean closer to you, or touch you back, this may indicate that they’re ready to keep moving forward with you. If you get a more negative response, back off a little bit and give your partner some space.[12]
- Keep your touch light and playful so that your potential kissing partner doesn’t get creeped out or feel like you’re pressuring them. Try quick touches in safe areas, such as the arm or knee.[13]
- 1 Ask for a kiss in a playful or flirty way. People differ on whether or not they would like to be asked before they’re kissed. Someone who has never been kissed may not be as familiar with hints you’re dropping, so it may be easier to just directly ask.[14]
- …
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